(The time that I originally started this post was around the 20th of June and since then I added to it the end of the story. The weeks and days that I talk about here takes place around the 3rd week of June)
This weekly post originally was going to be about how Archangel Michael helped me and supported me in great ways. How his presence in my life made me have great changes in myself and the way I think about the world around me. But today is different, in the last week or so I have grown to almost hate his presence around me and the angels in-general.
Okay maybe hate IS a strong word but they or just Michael have been jumping on my last nerve lately.
My mood has tumbled down a lot in the last 5 or so days. It started innocently enough, I was just annoyed over a few bad events that happened over the beginning of last week. Then of course he calls me to the cards to address my problems and at the time I didn't want to hear it. When I'm pissed off I like to be alone and be pissed off. I of course state my disgust to him and ask to him "lay off" a bit. The following days was everything BUT THAT. I got more number patterns, card callings from Michael, and pleads of "relax and not think about it" answers of my occasional "wanting answers" to my horrible mood.
Which all lead me to what I like to call "I hate the world" mode. I literally hated everything especially the angels. I hated thinking about them and I hated the fact they were around me. I just didn't want to be bothered with them and their antics. I wanted them to crawl up the ass of whatever god they came from. Included in that whirlwind of hatred I felt confused about everything around me. My goals, feelings, and just the reason I'm alive. All I wanted to do is sleep and not wake up or take a very long vacation on the moon alone. "All I want is to be alone for a few days" I kept telling Michael but I think angels or at least him are slightly off in the head.
For whatever ever reason when I'm in my "really bad mood" the angels stick to me like glue. Thank god that spirit guides are a little more knowledgeable about human life and leave me be when I ask. After I ripped Joe's (my spirit guide) head off when I was extremely upset a few years ago I never heard from him again whenever I'm upset . Its like he's never around and I appreciate that he respect my wishes to just be alone. The angels are a different story or a least Michael. He never leaves my side and always slams his advice through the cards which stirs up my mood day after day. I try to shut him out and he just comes back like nothing happened.
"My god do I wish that he would disappear" is all I could think of in the last few days. And at the point where I was feeling better (not thinking or doing anything but watching mindless TV), he called me to the cards only for my angry mood to be stirred up by it. From then I took action, I got the box of cards and stuffed them down some boxes so whenever I would go in my room, I wouldn't be able to be called by them.
It felt good, damn good and I wished I done it sooner. As I would go back and forth by the boxes Michael would always say "let me out" as if he was really stuck down there. We both know that if he wanted too, can create a hurricane in my room or create a miracle and give me numbers to the next big lottery. Yet he insisted that he was indeed stuck and could not get out unless "I" let him out. Even using my imagination where we usually have our conversations in a comfortable living room, the door was locked shut. Notably, when I tried to lock that door without hiding the cards Michael would just go through the door or the lock wouldn't really exist for some reason.
So with my victory at hand I went about my day but got frustrated and somewhat amused about Michael being stuck in the box. He insisted again that he could not be freed unless "I" freed him, so I decided to make a bargain with him. He had to prove to me that he was the real archangel Michael in some way. For the better half of the last 2 or so weeks his personality got more playful and kid like which I didn't mind. But I did question for a bit if I was really in contact with Michael in my less then happy week, or it was a random spirit or angel just messing with me. Though he's advice and "his" way of giving them have been consistent so my suspicions didn't fly far, but I wanted to have "fun" with him. As well as a way to keep my sanity by not letting him out the box and not feel so guilty that he was indeed "trapped" in the box. He's a powerful angel, I'm sure he can prove his "innocence" (a card that he consistently gave me through out last week) to me and it would be a piece of cake.
So I went through my day hanging out with my best friend Brandon and its been a few hours since I made that deal with Michael. Brandon was surfing the web on his lap top next to me on my desktop. He was looking at the "trending topic" tweets on Twitter and was scrolling down the page. We both looked and laughed at the random tweets when I suddenly looked up at a certain persons name and saw "Sarah Michaels". My brain exploded and thought "What the hell, he actually did it" while another part of me was "damn I have to let him out now". I thought the game was over so when I went back upstairs in my room Michael insisted that I would truly let him out the box. I didn't want to, my day have been the best in about a week and if my mood tumbled down again like it has I was going to jump out of my bedroom window.
So I decided to play hard ball and told him that the name was "Michaels" and not "Michael" so it didn't count. I'm sure he wasn't impressed with my change of heart but my crappy week was all a game to him so it was time that I returned the favor. He pleaded more to let him out that night and with my feelings of guilt building up I decided to "let up" a bit. I told him that I would let him out that morning and call it a day. He wanted to be let out that night but my sanity was at sake so I didn't entertain his request.
So that next morning arrived and of course Michael was ready to be let out of the horrible box of infinite terror. I was hungry and dehydrated so I told him "after I get something to eat" then went to the kitchen. I ate and I think spent some time on the computer then went back upstairs to my room. I didn't hear his mouth this time as I sat on the side of the bed to take off my slippers when I saw a corner of a card under my bed. It was one of his cards and I thought "Gezz I must of missed that card that jumped out of the deck".
I pick the card up and turned it face up to read "SENSE OF HUMOR" plastered on the top of it.
My mind couldn't take the irony or the fact that he placed that card conveniently on the side of my bed so I could of course pick it up and read it. I never saw that card there before and I tend to sit on the side of the bed a lot. He somehow manifested that card that I KNEW I had in the deck and placed it right there for his "keys of freedom" and his amusement. I of course in my shock wake up Brandon with my ranting and raving. As soon as I saw the card I threw it down, stuffed my hand in the box and threw the deck cards on the ground.
"You win Michael, you win... I can't mess with that" is what I said after I let the event soak in my mind for the better part of the hour and took a run through of the deck to find my "sense of humor" card missing. He indeed proved to me that he was the real deal and that he had a funny bone the size of Texas. It also helped me break out of my "I hate the world" mode and my resentment towards the angels (I will admit Brandon can take the prize for my bad mood buster). Yes, they like to have fun but its not funny when I feel like my world is crashing around me. I hope that he took note of my moody patterns throughout last week.
Since that day however me and my relationship with Michael have gotten better. My spirit guide Joe has kindly relayed the message to him of how I like to be "alone" in my very upset mood this morning. The first time today when I was called to the cards I felt a "sorry" in them and a wanting to start over (something that I wanted for a few days now!). I drew the cards and he told me that Joe informed him about my ways and that he wanted to start over again. He looked and felt sorry in my imagination something I was really surprised about when everything was one big joke before.
I was more then willing to forgive him (since I wasn't in a horrible mood) and wanted him to know that I don't mind his childish nature but to "leave me the hell alone" next time I'm pissed off. He hugged me, agreed and told me that he was "leaving". Of course I didn't want him to leave since I was finally friendly with him again but I didn't want to stop him from doing anything that he needed to do. Joe reassured me that he wasn't really "leaving" and was going to come back, and like magic he did! He came back in a less childish personality and a more familiar serious tone.
I wanted to do a card reading with him to "finalize" this starting over ritual and the cards I drew were stunning!
♥ New beginnings and a fresh Start
♥ A favorable outcome
♥ God is in charge
♥ Positive thoughts create positive results
In what feels like forever I completely and utterly agreed in what the he had to say in the cards! He told me that even angels can make mistakes and this will only make our relationship stronger which I'm more then willing to accept. This wasn't the first time I had rough tides with my spirit helpers so I more then knew that this was only the beginning of an awesome partnership. I'm just glad that Michael was so eager to state his mistakes and do all he can to fix them as I followed suit. Even though he might not get offended like a person would, I should be more polite and respectful to him and not tell him to "fuck off" and other offending statements, but I will admit that when I'm taken over the edge I hold no punches.
Though he knew as well as myself that in my heart of hearts I admire and love him to death. Though I always thought my relationship with the divine was rather "odd" then the typical stories that I'm used to hearing. You wouldn't think that angels or archangel Michael at that could piss a person off or be down right annoying but they can. I should be rather blessed that the angels show such sides to me then feel like I've been cursed sometimes.
Right now my bad week and mood has passed and all I want to do is to talk to the angels about everything. I never want to have ill feelings about them or even say that they have their "downfalls" with being in contact with them. I however will state that even in my anger and resentment towards Michael he truly DID stay by my side even when I wanted him to disappear forever. He was willing to further put his head on the chopping block in hopes that I can get a glimpse of the light and humor he was trying to shine on me. He was very consistent on that note and only a true angel would be willing to be hated just to try to make a person feel better, especially me.
♥ Inner Child, The Divine Whisperer ♥ ( Testing out new titles, I seem to have a slight attachment to this one )